Random fish joke:
I got a bite the first time I went fishing. I panicked and phoned the Fisherman's Advice Bureau to see what I should do...
"Please hold the line" they said!
Weird never felt so funny. - Updated: 2025-10-23.
Selected fish jokes:
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The bobber shop.
Why do fishermen always argue? Because you can't catch de fish, without de bait.
What kind of money do fishermen make?
Net profits !
Mother to daughter advice: Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day. But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.
More fish and fishing jokes...
What kind of music should you listen to while fishing?
Something catchy!
Why did the husband go fishing on Valentines Day?
To catch his wife a bouquet of flounders!
What is the fastest fish in the water?
A motopike.
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The bobber shop.
Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
Because they have their own scales!
Why are fish so gullible?
They fall for things hook, line and sinker!
What do you call a fish that won’t shut up?
A big-mouthed bass!
Why are fish so smart ?
Because they swim in schools !