Random fish joke:
What kind of money do fishermen make?
Net profits !
Weird never felt so funny. - Updated: 2026-02-25.
Selected fish jokes:
Why didn’t Noah do much fishing on the ark?
He had only two worms.
Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
Because they have their own scales!
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
Why did Batman and Robin quit going fishing together?
Because Robin ate all the worms!
More fish and fishing jokes...
What kind of music should you listen to while fishing?
Something catchy!
Why did the husband go fishing on Valentines Day?
To catch his wife a bouquet of flounders!
What is the fastest fish in the water?
A motopike.
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The bobber shop.
Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
Because they have their own scales!
Why are fish so gullible?
They fall for things hook, line and sinker!
What do you call a fish that won’t shut up?
A big-mouthed bass!
Why are fish so smart ?
Because they swim in schools !