Latest Weird Jokes:

What is green and white and hops??

Frog sandwich on white bread.

- Random starter weird joke.

Hot Weird Crazy Jokes.

Once I forgot to bring my ventriloquist dummy to a show and I had use a voodoo doll of myself.
It was a pain in the hole.

Running into a wall with an erection and breaking your nose.

My inventor uncle had no luck.
He was always just missing out.
He invented WD 39 )

My tire went flat yesterday. So I went to the bowling alley so I could pick up a spare.

I took a urine test at the hospital yesterday.
My kleptomania is out of control.

Life is basically avoiding people who have seen you naked whilst trying to find new people to see you naked.

Me: I think you may have an unhealthy attachment.

Girlfriend, trying to breastfeed our dog: Why?

Gender reveals are pointless now days.
12 years later James is now Jessica with a penis.

Lots of people want chicken fingers.
But a very few wants to finger chickens.

The cross-eyed circumciser was so bad, he got the sack.

You’ve heard of a 69, but have you heard of a 71?
It’s like a 69 , but with two watching.

The pregnant woman who couldn't sing wasn't using her diaphragm properly.

At a certain age "Being good in bed" simply means not snoring...

Just got an email from a necrophiliac wishing me dead.
Hey, thanks for the compliment!

What’s the difference between necrofilia and choking fetish?

15 seconds.

Every time I see a set of twins, I always ask them: Which one of you is the unplanned one?

What’s the policy for the buffet at the orgy?
First Come First Serve.

I have a foot fetish...
I have tried using meters but it just doesn't work for me.

I found my first grey pubic hair today..
Normally things like that don't bother me...
But this was in my Big Mac..