Unlock the Humor of Language with Linguistics Jokes.

Her : my pussy gets wet for a guy who can speak spanish.

Me : Bonjour.

There's "hell" in hello, "good" in goodbye, "lie" in believe, "over" in lover, "end" in friend, "ex" in "next", "if" in life.

Hot and cool are antonyms but both are compliments.

What is the least spoken language in the world? Sign language.

Of course I can read Polish, I just don't know what the words mean.

After a long career my Spanish teacher retired.

Au revoir.

"What is a tautology?"

"A tautology is a tautology."

A disastrous Thursday for the French:

Trajeudi.

Why do innuendos and double entendres drive you crazy?

Cause they're a Hintfinite loop.

We all laugh in the same language.

My son asked me, "What does déjà vu mean?"

I said, "I have a feeling you asked me this before!"

Your accent is your voice’s font.

It's a fact a lot of us do NOT know the meaning of the French word "pourquoi".
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Translate that into English and you'll see why.

English lesson.

Tsunami T is silent
Psychology P is silent.
Knife K is silent
Honest H is silent
Wife Husband is silent

What did the English ‘c’ say to the French ‘ç’ ?

“Monsieur, your zipper’s down.”

Induction: the act of inserting ducks.

Deduction: the act of removing ducks.

Reduction: the act of putting the ducks back.

The word PAPA means pope in Italian, shark in Swahili, potato in Quechua and arse in Maori.
I wonder if papa John ever shoved a hot papa up the papa of a basking papa?

Why mexicans cant cross the border in threes?
No trespassing.

I hate people who use deep English just to make us feel intoxicated by exuberance of verbosity betaprutal contraption.

In American English, the T in "Subtle" is silent because we threw that thing in the Boston Harbor.

“Everyone smiles in the same language.”
- George Carlin

I was out walking when this Spanish guy passed by me three times. I thought whats up with him, then realised he was a trespasser.

is Spanish the plural of wife is wives and its spelled
esposas
which translates back to wives...
and handcuffs or manacles...

Whoever put the 'b' in subtle was a clever bastard.

FUN Fact:
Go. is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

I used to be poor. Then I bought a thesaurus, and now I'm impecunious.

America: We are free from the British, what should we do first?

Someone in the back of the crowd: Let’s change our spelling.

What language does Santa Claus speak? North Polish.

Why is a bra singular and panties plural?

I would love to speak a foreign language but I can't. So I grew hair under my arms instead.
- Sue Kolinsky

Basically English is what happened when Vikings learned Latin and used it to shout at Germans.

I speak 4 languages, English, profanity, sarcasm & real shit!

"Is there a word in the English language that contains all the vowels?"

"Unquestionably!"

I said to my local Baker "I would like a Sweet Pastry please'
He said "Danish"
I said "Oh Sorry, Jeg vil gerne have et sødt kager venligst"

Why do zombies speak Latin? It's a dead language.

Double negatives don’t make no sense...
I am Positive about that!

I bet my road rage would be taken more seriously if I spoke German.

I am. Is the shortest sentence in the English language. I do. Is the longest.

What did the goose say when his flock landed on a balcony in Brazil?
I don’t know - I don’t speak porch of geese.

Why do zombies speak Latin? It's a dead language.