Random breakfast joke:
Welcome to parenthood, your kid will now sing songs like "poop there it is" while eating breakfast.
Weird never felt so funny. - Updated: 2025-12-20.
Selected breakfast jokes:
Back in Soviet Russia, little Misha is being read to by his babysitter. She reads: 'In the USSR, kindegardens are filled with wonderful toys.'
Misha listens with bright eyes.
'In the USSR, every child has a brand new bicycle.'
Little Misha opens his eyes even wider.
'In the USSR, every child drinks hot cocoa for breakfast.'
Little Misha starts crying his eyes out, bawling:
'I want to go to the USSR!'
What did the tightrope walker eat for breakfast?
A balanced meal!
An Irish couple, an English couple and a Scottish couple are having breakfast together in a hotel..
The English husband says "could you pass me the sugar, sugar?" to his wife.
The Scot follows suit, says to his wife "could you pass me the honey, honey?"
The Irishman then turns to his wife and says "could you pass me the milk you fucking cow?"
Mushrooms. The breakfast of champignons.
More breakfast jokes...
What did Salvador Dali have for breakfast?
A bowl of surreal. 🎨🖌🖼
“A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. He shouted at her, “You aren’t so good in bed either!” then stormed off to work. By mid-morning, he decided he’d better make amends and called home. “What took you so long to answer?” he asked. “I was in bed,” she replied. “What were you doing in bed this late?” “Getting a second opinion.”