Random breakfast joke:
What did the tightrope walker eat for breakfast?
A balanced meal!
Weird never felt so funny. - Updated: 2026-09-15.
Selected breakfast jokes:
"There is no order in the world around us, we must adapt ourselves to the requirements of chaos instead.”
- Kurt Vonnegut, Breakfast of Champions
Went into the kitchen this morning, the wife was face-down and not breathing. I panicked and didn't know what to do...
Then I remembered that McDonald's do breakfast until 10.30!
Sleep is time machine to breakfast.
Back in Soviet Russia, little Misha is being read to by his babysitter. She reads: 'In the USSR, kindegardens are filled with wonderful toys.'
Misha listens with bright eyes.
'In the USSR, every child has a brand new bicycle.'
Little Misha opens his eyes even wider.
'In the USSR, every child drinks hot cocoa for breakfast.'
Little Misha starts crying his eyes out, bawling:
'I want to go to the USSR!'
More breakfast jokes...
What did Salvador Dali have for breakfast?
A bowl of surreal. 🎨🖌🖼
“A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. He shouted at her, “You aren’t so good in bed either!” then stormed off to work. By mid-morning, he decided he’d better make amends and called home. “What took you so long to answer?” he asked. “I was in bed,” she replied. “What were you doing in bed this late?” “Getting a second opinion.”