Random breakfast joke:
"I was in a play called breakfast in bed once". "Did you have a big role?" "No, just toast with a bit of butter".
Weird never felt so funny. - Updated: 2026-08-28.
Selected breakfast jokes:
I masturbated so good last night that when i woke up my clit was in the kitchen cooking breakfast.
I told my friend I’d buy him a full English breakfast as long as he kept his hands out of his trousers. He didn’t touch his sausage.
I got up at 5am, ran 5 miles, and then ate a veggie smoothie for breakfast... I don't remember the rest of the nightmare.
I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
More breakfast jokes...
What did Salvador Dali have for breakfast?
A bowl of surreal. 🎨🖌🖼
“A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. He shouted at her, “You aren’t so good in bed either!” then stormed off to work. By mid-morning, he decided he’d better make amends and called home. “What took you so long to answer?” he asked. “I was in bed,” she replied. “What were you doing in bed this late?” “Getting a second opinion.”