Random zoo joke:
A man was driving and saw a truck stalled on the side of the highway that had ten penguins standing next to it. The man pulled over and asked the truck driver if he needed any help. The truck driver replied, "If you can take these penguins to the zoo while I wait for AAA that will be great!" The man agreed and the penguins hopped into the back of his car. Two hours later, the trucker was back on the road again and decided to check on the penguins. He showed up at the zoo and they weren't there! He headed back into his truck and started driving around the town, looking for any sign of the penguins, the man, or his car. While driving past a movie theater, the truck driver spotted the guy walking out with the ten penguins. The truck driver yelled, "What are you doing? You were supposed to take them to the zoo!" The man replied, "I did and then I had some extra money so I took them to go see a movie."
Selected zoo jokes:
A big cat escaped it's cage at the zoo yesterday.
If I saw that I'd puma pants.
I've got the memory of an elephant.
I remember going to the zoo and seeing an elephant.
The difference between a Zoo and a Museum is a matter of life and death.
So a guy went to a zoo on his day off. There were no animals there besides one dog. It was a Shit Tzu.
More zoo jokes...
To start a zoo you need at least 2 pandas, a grizzly and a polar.
It’s the bear minimum.
Go to a goat petting zoo to experience a close encounter of the herd kind.
All the animals at the zoo were asleep when I visited. I was otterly disappointed.
A cage gate at the rare Asian animals' annex at the zoo was left unlocked. It was a panda-monium.
I applied for the position of a keeper at the zoo but turns out I was not koalafied.
Got kicked out of the zoo for feeding the ducks...
To the crocodiles.
Apparently to start a zoo you need at least two pandas, a grizzly and three polars.
It's the bear minimum.
The difference between a Zoo and a Museum is a matter of life and death.
A big cat escaped it's cage at the zoo yesterday.
If I saw that I'd puma pants.
I go to the zoo to watch the monkeys wanking, but they don't seem to like it.
All I'm saying is if I'm not allowed to give a monkey a gun at the zoo they should have a sign.
If you're confident enough, every zoo is a petting zoo.
I spotted a lion at the zoo the other day. He looks like a leopard now.
I've got the memory of an elephant.
I remember going to the zoo and seeing an elephant.
Went to the zoo yesterday...I saw a loaf in a cage..
I asked a zookeeper why did they put a loaf in a cage?..
Apparently.... It was bread in captivity...
The zoo is a safe place to fart.
My friend worked at the zoo to circumcise elephants, the pay was bad but...
The tips were huge.
A man was driving and saw a truck stalled on the side of the highway that had ten penguins standing next to it. The man pulled over and asked the truck driver if he needed any help. The truck driver replied, "If you can take these penguins to the zoo while I wait for AAA that will be great!" The man agreed and the penguins hopped into the back of his car. Two hours later, the trucker was back on the road again and decided to check on the penguins. He showed up at the zoo and they weren't there! He headed back into his truck and started driving around the town, looking for any sign of the penguins, the man, or his car. While driving past a movie theater, the truck driver spotted the guy walking out with the ten penguins. The truck driver yelled, "What are you doing? You were supposed to take them to the zoo!" The man replied, "I did and then I had some extra money so I took them to go see a movie."
So a guy went to a zoo on his day off. There were no animals there besides one dog. It was a Shit Tzu.
I have the memory of an elephant!
I went to the Zoo when I was 9 and saw an elephant.
I remember it.