Unleashing the Irreverent: Blasphemy Jokes for the Fearless.

Where we don't apologize for laughing at the divine.

I asked God for forgiveness, but he replied with a blasphemy joke.

They say blasphemy is a sin, but I say it's just divine satire.

When it comes to blasphemy, even the angels can't help but chuckle.

Blasphemy Jokes meme.
Blasphemy Jokes meme.

Weird never felt so funny.
- Updated: 2024-07-20.

  1. No sacred cow is safe here!

  2. Don't fear Satan, God is the one who judges you.

    *Jesus having sex*

    Jesus: call me daddy

    her: oh God

    Jesus: perfect

    You were born an atheist until someone lied to you.

    Women defending the burqa are like chicken advertising KFC.

    Islamophobe: A person who knows more about Islam than Muslims are comfortable with.

  3. Where blasphemy is the name of the game!

  4. If Jesus doesn’t want us to have sex then why’s his middle name Fuckin’?

    Cult: Small unpopular religion.
    Religion: Large popular cult.

    Religion is the practice of using nonsense to explain ignorance.

    Atheism Isn't a Religion….It's a personal relationship with Reality.

    A new study shows that the only real virgin was Joseph.

  5. Offensive? Definitely. Entertaining? Absolutely!

  6. If you feel stupid...

    Remember 2.38 billion people think a virgin can be pregnant by a ghost.

    Religion - when grown ass adults argue about who has the better invisible friend.

    If Jesus turned water into wine, why does water still exist?

    I’m a Creationist, I believe man created god.

    Quran: A camel herder's guide to the galaxy.

  7. Welcome to the dark side of faith!

  8. A pretty woman went to a mullah, “Please pray a cure me of my disease.”

    Mullah said, ''I will pray for a cure for you, but as a token of gratitude, you must go to bed with me.”

    She agreed, and the mullah had good sex.
    Then the mullah asked, “Tell me, what is your ailment?”

    “I have AIDS” replied the woman.

    72 virgins in Islam.
    “Promising pussy in the afterlife is the lowest thing I ever heard in my life”.

    ~ Bill Maher

    What do you call an avocado at church?

    Holy guacamole!

    “If there is a God, He will have to beg for my forgiveness”

    -- found on the walls of a concentration camp after 1941

    Religion is the tool invented by the powerful to control the stupid.

  9. Where we break the rules and laugh about it.

  10. Mary : i’m pregnant

    Joseph : but we’ve never had sex??

    Mary : you’re not gonna believe this..

    Why is Adam considered the fastest person in the Bible?

    He came first in the human race.

    I respect your beliefs and your religion even though they are totally wrong and made up.

    It’s like history but without facts.

    Why are priests called father? because its too suspicious to call them daddy.

  11. Where blasphemy meets comedy.

  12. If god has a plan then what the fuck are you praying for?

    If God created man in his own image
    Why aren't we all invisible, undetectable and unreachable like him?

    Study finds 100% of men would eat any fruit given to them by a naked woman.

    In a parallel universe Jesus is turning wine into water. He is NOT popular.

    I tried to make a halal sandwich but made a pig's ear of it.

  13. Unapologetically blasphemous.

  14. You don’t need religion to have a moral compass. You do need religion to cover up not having one.

    The Bible is only accurate when thrown at close range.

    Older Nurse talking to younger collogue: "Did you see the man in Rm 14? He has 'Adam' tattooed on his penis."

    Younger prettier nurse: "It says Amsterdam."

    Humans are proof that God makes mistakes.

    God works in mysterious ways is a euphemism for "Stop asking hard questions".

  15. Where we find humor in the sacred and laugh in the face of tradition.

  16. Call me Jesus Christ cuz I love getting nailed and stoned.

    Why did women love jesus?

    Theyd love you too if you were hung like this.

    Like Aron Ra said "tell me which gender children a priest likes to fiddle and I can tell whether he is protestant or Catholic".

    What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?

    Only takes one nail to hang the painting.

    Science flies people to the moon.

    Religion flies people into buildings.

More blasphemy jokes on the following pages...

SEE also - CULT, FANTASY and MAGIC Jokes - hilarious fantastic collection to make you laugh:

Why did the wizard join a cult? Because he wanted to add a little magic to his religious experience! Brace yourself for a divine dose of humor that will leave you spellbound and laughing out loud. Whether you're a believer or not, these jokes are sure to cast a spell on your funny bone. So grab your wand, put on your wizard hat, and get ready for a heavenly dose of laughter!