Zombie jokes that'll make you scream... with laughter!

Where the only thing infectious is our sense of humor.


Zombies: they're just dying to meet you!

Zombies: because walking like a normal human is just too mainstream.

Zombies: they may be slow, but they're always hungry for success... and brains!

Zombie Jokes meme.
Zombie Jokes meme.

Weird never felt so funny.
- Updated: 2024-12-29.




  1. Revive your funny bone with Zombie Jokes.


  2. What is black, white and dead all over?

    A zombie in a tuxedo.


    As a funeral director, I tie the shoe laces together of the deceased.

    Because if there was ever a zombie apocalypse, it would be hilarious.


    “If you could choose one person living or dead to hang out with who would it be?”

    - how to confuse a zombie


    Why do zombies speak Latin? It's a dead language.


    Everyone's self worth should only be measured by how useful they would be in the zombie apocalypse.



  3. Proving that zombies have a killer sense of humor.


  4. Why don't zombies eat ghosts?
    Because they taste like sheet.


    Why do zombies speak Latin? It's a dead language.


    I tried to make a song with the cranberries but the lead singer is now a *zombie*.


    Why did the zombie ignore all his Facebook friends? He was still DIGESTING all of his followers on Twitter!


    I stabbed a vampire, beat some zombies to death and killed the devil himself...

    My wife rushed into the room and shouted, "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GIVE THEM CANDIES."



  5. Laugh 'til you decay at Zombie Jokes.


  6. Why do prostitutes love servicing zombies? They always leave a tip.


    After watching a few zombie films I've come to the conclusion that I would be a cameraman in the event of a zombie-apocalypse.
    They never seem to attack them.


    Q: Did you hear about the vegan Zombie?
    A: He went to the insane asylum and only ate the vegetables!


    - What does a vegan zombie eat?
    - GRAAIIIIIIIINS.


    - What does a zombie get when it bites a ghost?
    - A mouth full of sheet!





More zombie jokes on the following pages...


SEE also - CULT, FANTASY and MAGIC Jokes - hilarious fantastic collection to make you laugh:

Why did the wizard join a cult? Because he wanted to add a little magic to his religious experience! Brace yourself for a divine dose of humor that will leave you spellbound and laughing out loud. Whether you're a believer or not, these jokes are sure to cast a spell on your funny bone. So grab your wand, put on your wizard hat, and get ready for a heavenly dose of laughter!