Rock Music Jokes - Unleash Your Inner Rockstar with Hilarious Humor.

The first rule of no doubt club is don’t speak.

Does the band Dirty Blanket only perform covers?

I'm currently halfway through reading the book of genesis and not a single mention of Phil Collins.

When I find myself In times of trouble
Master Yoda comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom - “Be, it let"

Starting a tribute band called “Paper.”

We cover rock.

I just got married but I’m not feeling great about it. For our “first dance” my wife choose the song:…

…”I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.”

The other day I walked past the lead singer of R.E.M.

I thought that I heard him laughing.

I read a book on how to end a sentence with Beatles songs.

I should finish it when I get back.

Noel Gallagher was sad to sell his private jet and as he walked away his manager saw Liam next to it celebrating his purchase.
Manager urged Noel away saying "don't look back in hangar."

What do you call it when members of the band Scorpions upgrade their OS version?
Windows change.

Rage Against the Machine never specified what machine made them angry, but I bet it was a printer.

My friend has opened a gin bar, which only plays music by The Cult.
She sells tanqueray.

If you're wanting to know how to make your guitar playing sound better, stay tuned.

Papa: Listen, it's a song by The Beatles.

Son: The who?

Papa: No, The Beatles.

Paul McCartney has been asked to improve the Syrian president's skimpy underwear.

Take Assad's thong and make it better.

Man saw a revival at clear water, but didnt lend any credence to that fact.

What would one of the Beatles say during an orgy?
Cum together, right now, over me.

I used to listen to U2 but I am so over the edge.

My Gramma broke up with her heavy metal boyfriend. I guess she’s off her rocker.

A rock band donated a box of vegetables to the charity they were playing at. Well, except the drummer.

He kept the beet.

Music teacher: "Define rock and roll."

From back of class: "Dwayne Johnson with a bun!"

To me, the only real middle of the road band are The White Stripes.

I'm not a Huey Lewis fan, but I go to their concerts because my wife likes them.

That's the power of love.

Listening to Queens albums could be bad for your health due to...

high mercury content...

Which Led Zeppelin song do realtors love most?
“A Whole Lot Of Love.”

My wife asked me to get rid of my Meatloaf record collection, I told her "I'll do anything for love but I won't do that"!

When The Edge was at school, he was a border.

What is a Viking’s favorite music?

Ragnarock.

My wife is upset because The Rolling Stones had to cancel their concert. I told her, "You can't always get what you want."

A band member from the group Boston went to the dentist, he had more than a filling.

A Mexican Beatles cover band's drummer would be called Gringo Starr.

I was gonna ask which Nirvana album was the best but then I thought.... Nevermind.

Have you heard of the band tesla/Edison
They didn't become successful until they changed their name to AC/DC
Their still current.

I bought an Oasis GPS and now... ...all the roads I have to drive are winding.

I went to a record shop and asked, “have you got anything by the Doors?” He said, “Yes, a bucket of sand, a mop and a brush”.

If we can hurry things along a bit, the new Aerosmith documentary starts shortly and I dont want to miss a thing.

I tried shipping a Bon Jovi album to my cousin for Christmas but it hasn’t been delivered.

The tracking report keeps saying “oh, it’s halfway there”.

A bunch of geologist friends of mine just started a rock group.

Just letting you all know that the Beatles museum is now open 8 days a week.

My dentist is originally from Boston.
I hate going to see him, as you always know it's going to be more than a filling.

Gene Simmons is writing a scandalous novel about his time in the band. It’s going to be a Kiss and tell book.

A rock band donated a box of vegetables to the charity they were playing at. Well, except the drummer.

He kept the beet.

Can't stop thinking about how Robert Plant tried to sneeze for like a solid minute on Whole Lotta Love.

I dreamed last night that I was on stage, singing "Shiny Happy People". I assume this dream occurred during REM sleep.

I attended a rock concert performed by Styx and the Rolling Stones.
I returned with broken bones.

I used to be in a very heavy metal band. I played a lead guitar.

What blink 182 failed to mention is that no one likes you after 23 either.

I will listen to Elton John’s “Rocket Man” until I finish mowing.

I think it’s gonna be a long lawn time.

I joined a group named “Hotel California” and I didn’t like it. I tried to exit the group, but I was informed I could never leave.

I went to a concert the other night. Though the admission was reasonable, I didn't care for the band and want my Nickelback!!!!

I said to Mick Jagger ‘don’t eat that mouldy bread’. He said ‘I know, it’s only a rotten roll but I like it’.

I went into a record shop the other day. I asked the fella at the counter if he had anything by The Doors? "Yes", he said. "Two fire buckets and an umbrella stand"

Hard to believe the Beatles broke up over a guitar. John wanted Less Paul.

Just letting you know that the Beatles museum is now open 8 days a week.

My friend said to me: "Who is the best band ever?"
I said, "Are they?"

Crazy how we never looked at this photograph until Nickleback told us to..

My wife asked me when I was going to stop quoting Stereophonics lyrics...
I said "Maybe tomorrow..."

NEWS FLASH: Dire Straits are reforming with a new lead singer, Chris Rhea. They've renamed the band Dire Rhea.

Bloody Foreigner - coming over here, wanting to know what love is!

I've been at The Clash concert for an hour and the band still hasn't come out.

Should I stay or should I go now?