Where we don't apologize for laughing at the divine.

I asked God for forgiveness, but he replied with a blasphemy joke.

They say blasphemy is a sin, but I say it's just divine satire.

When it comes to blasphemy, even the angels can't help but chuckle.

Blasphemy joke.

No sacred cow is safe here!

If Jesus turned water into wine, why does water still exist?

I’m a Creationist, I believe man created god.

Quran: A camel herder's guide to the galaxy.

A pretty woman went to a mullah, “Please pray a cure me of my disease.”

Mullah said, ''I will pray for a cure for you, but as a token of gratitude, you must go to bed with me.”

She agreed, and the mullah had good sex.
Then the mullah asked, “Tell me, what is your ailment?”

“I have AIDS” replied the woman.

72 virgins in Islam.
“Promising pussy in the afterlife is the lowest thing I ever heard in my life”.

~ Bill Maher

Where blasphemy is the name of the game!

What do you call an avocado at church?

Holy guacamole!

“If there is a God, He will have to beg for my forgiveness”

-- found on the walls of a concentration camp after 1941

Religion is the tool invented by the powerful to control the stupid.

Mary : i’m pregnant

Joseph : but we’ve never had sex??

Mary : you’re not gonna believe this..

Why is Adam considered the fastest person in the Bible?

He came first in the human race.

Offensive? Definitely. Entertaining? Absolutely!

I respect your beliefs and your religion even though they are totally wrong and made up.

It’s like history but without facts.

Why are priests called father? because its too suspicious to call them daddy.

If god has a plan then what the fuck are you praying for?

If God created man in his own image
Why aren't we all invisible, undetectable and unreachable like him?

Welcome to the dark side of faith!

Study finds 100% of men would eat any fruit given to them by a naked woman.

In a parallel universe Jesus is turning wine into water. He is NOT popular.

I tried to make a halal sandwich but made a pig's ear of it.

You don’t need religion to have a moral compass. You do need religion to cover up not having one.

The Bible is only accurate when thrown at close range.

Where we break the rules and laugh about it.

Older Nurse talking to younger collogue: "Did you see the man in Rm 14? He has 'Adam' tattooed on his penis."

Younger prettier nurse: "It says Amsterdam."

Humans are proof that God makes mistakes.

God works in mysterious ways is a euphemism for "Stop asking hard questions".

Call me Jesus Christ cuz I love getting nailed and stoned.

Why did women love jesus?

Theyd love you too if you were hung like this.

Where blasphemy meets comedy.

Like Aron Ra said "tell me which gender children a priest likes to fiddle and I can tell whether he is protestant or Catholic".

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?

Only takes one nail to hang the painting.

Science flies people to the moon.

Religion flies people into buildings.

What does God call his nose?

God knows.

If God were a vehicle, what kind of vehicle would he be?

An ice cream truck, because he brings joy to those who discover Him, but people who follow Him too closely are usually paedophiles.

Unapologetically blasphemous.

According to the Bible, God killed 2,391,421 people and Satan only killed 10.

Anyone else think we might be following the wrong guy?

I may not be perfect, but Jesus thinks I’m to die for.

The first commandment states: “I am the Lord thy God. Thou shalt have no other gods before me.”

But two of the seven deadly sins are vanity and envy. Fucking Hypocrite!

Why did God make man before He made woman?

Because He didn’t want any advice on how to do it.

How do you teach a bunch of kids about God—who He is, and what He does?

Gather them all in a classroom. Then never show up.

Where we find humor in the sacred and laugh in the face of tradition.

If God really made everything…

He’s Chinese, right?

They say that when you die you become closer to God.

Because you no longer fucking exist, right?

Bacon proves God has a sense of humor.

He invents the greatest meat in the world, then bans His chosen people from eating it.

People commonly believe that Jesus died a virgin, but I heard he got nailed right before he died.

If God created man in His own image…

He’s a fucking pervert.

More blasphemy jokes on the following pages...