Oddball Jokes: Where logic takes a vacation and absurdity reigns supreme.
"Normality is a paved road: It's comfortable to walk, but no flowers grow on it."
- Vincent van Gogh
Weird never felt so funny.
- Updated:
2024-12-11.
Bizarre Jokes: Get Your Giggle on the Weird Side.
Embark on a oddball journey where the normal is abnormal.
Weirdly Funny, Funnily Weird.
Where Normal Jokes Don't Apply!
Get Weird, Get Hilarious, Get Your Laughs Here!
My boss just told me off for wearing pyjamas to work.
"But everybody else is wearing them," I protested.
He said, "I know, but they're your patients."
Me: That hemorrhoid cream really caused a bad reaction.
Doctor: Where did you apply it?
Me: On the bus.
I called my doctors surgery this morning.
"I need to make an appointment for as soon as possible," I said, "Everything in my ear is echoing."
"Ok," she replied, "How does tomorrow sound?"
I said, "Tomorrow, orrow, row, ow."
Every time dreams come true the alarm clock turns on.
I hate cleaning my windows…
It’s a pane in the glass.
In 2018 Vilnius, the capital of Lithuania, ran an ad campaign branding itself as the "G-Spot of Europe" accompanied by the slogan "Nobody knows where it is, but when you get there - it's amazing."
What do you get when you cross a cow and a trampoline?
A milkshake that really bounces!
Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had drumsticks!
People with “Trust No one” tattoos are liars.
They have already trusted the tattoo artist.
I have a problem with my genitals.
One of my balls hangs lower than the other two.
Porn sites are the only places where it’s acceptable to separate people by their age, sexuality, race and country.
We eat chickens before they are born and after they are dead.
Porn is just videos of people at their work.
To the woman who keeps pounding on my door at night:
I'm not letting you out.
Did you know that too much sex can cause memory loss?
I read that in a medical journal on page 64, at 2:34pm on Friday 15th of August, 2021.
If you see a road sign that says "Survey Crew Ahead" they are not actually interested in your opinion.
I know that now.
"Normal = neutral expression concealing existential despair and brain-crushing boredom."
-SecUnit, Network Effect
The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She gagged.
What does a robot do after sex?
He nuts and bolts.
My jokes are like semen.
Sometimes they land and stick.
Other times they are hard to swallow.
Today's weird fact:
a snowman's kids are called chill-dren.
Doctor: What seems to be the problem?
Cat: Meow.
Doctor: Ok but where?
My sexual preference is.....often.
Do nudists solve problems?
No they "nut" things out, get to the " bottom" of it and "figure" it out.