Top Funniest Chuck Norris Jokes to Make You Laugh Out Loud.

A roundhouse kick to the funny bone, delivering a powerful punchline.

"Chuck Norris doesn't need a stunt double. Stunt doubles need Chuck Norris."
- Tom Cruise

"Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups, he pushes the world down."
- Arnold Schwarzenegger

"Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits."
- Jason Statham

CHUCK NORRIS Jokes meme.
CHUCK NORRIS Jokes meme.

Weird never felt so funny.
- Updated: 2024-07-20.

  1. Chuck Approved Humor: A comedic tribute to the legend himself.

  2. When Chuck Norris walks into a movie theater with his cell phone on, they turn off the movie.

    When Chuck Norris finishes shaving, he puts aftershave on his razor.

    The government pays Chuck Norris taxes.

    When Chuck Norris was late for school teachers punished the rest of the class for being early.

    If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Chuck Norris says it’s beef, it’s beef!

  3. Puns of Steel: When it comes to Mr Norris, laughter is the best defense.

  4. Santa Claus delivers presents so he can stay on Chuck Norris's nice list.

    Ikea assembles Chuck Norris's furniture.

    Chuck Norris can be Jewish and still eat Pork.

    The batteries in Chuck's cell phone automatically charge while he's using it.

    Chuck Norris made Twisted Sister take it.

  5. And if you ever find yourself in a tough spot, just ask yourself, "What would Mr Norris do?"

  6. Chuck Norris was not lonely at Heartbreak Hotel.

    When Chuck Norris goes to Rome, The Romans do as Chuck.

    The reason the band Kiss wears makeup is because they are hiding from Chuck Norris.

    Chuck Norris can make a cow out of cheese.

    Chuck Norris never has to plug in his Tesla.

  7. He is the embodiment of toughness and badassery.

  8. Chuck can see the invisible man.

    Chuck Norris can play ping pong alone.

    Glock carries Chuck Norris for self-defense.

    Chuck Norris once won a staring contest against his own reflection

    Chuck Norris likes his coffee strong enough to bend a spoon!

  9. Enter the realm of Chuck Norris jokes, if you dare!

  10. Chuck Norris is listed before Chuck Morris in alphabetical lists.

    Real estate agents pay Chuck Norris to not buy a house.

    Chuck Norris once parallel parked a train.

    Chuck Norris would make socialism work everywhere he tried it.

    Chuck Norris can fix stupid!

  11. Chuck Norris jokes: Where humor meets invincibility.

  12. When you pull Chuck Norris's finger - YOU fart.

    Chuck Norris knocks his cat's stuff off the shelf.

    The fear of spiders is arachnophobia, there fear of tight spaces is claustrophobia, the fear of Chuck Norris is just common sense.

    Chuck Norris still gets free CDs and cassettes from Columbia House. He never subscribed.

    Jack Daniels once took a shot of Chuck Norris… and still has a hangover to this day.

  13. Discover the legend behind the laughter: Chuck Norris jokes.

  14. Chuck Norris has never filled out an online form because Chuck Norris never submits.

    Chuck Norris collected his money left to him by the Nigerian Prince.

    Baby Shark can't get Chuck Norris out of his head.

    Chuck Norris can eat at Taco Bell and NOT get diarrhea.

    Chuck Norris went to Walmart, and opened all the registers.

  15. Laugh your way through the unstoppable force of Chuck Norris.

  16. A pot watched by Chuck Norris boils immediately.

    Chuck Norris Rattlesnake belt is still alive.

    Chuck Norris ran the Boston Marathon backwards, just to see who finished in 2nd place!

    Chuck Norris once had a race against time. Time's still running

    Tony Stark really wanted to build a Chuck Norris suit but he wasn’t rich enough.

More Best Chuck Norris Jokes on the following pages...

SEE also - The TOP MOST viewed Jokes - hilarious collection with top views:

They have been viewed so many times that they've practically become the unofficial currency of internet humor, making us wonder if we're all just living in a digital comedy club.