Random trollers' joke:
me: why do you assume I'll say something stupid?
her: you're awake
Selected trolling jokes:
I'm currently making some changes in my life, and if you don't hear from me, then you're one of them.
More trolling jokes...
I like to put things back where I got them from when I am done using them...so I dropped your mom off at the bar.
Just because you're trash doesn't mean you can't do great things. It's called garbage can, not garbage cannot.
If you ever hear me breathe deeply it's not because I'm annoyed it's because I forget to breathe sometimes.
I passed a guy with a cup sitting outside a 7-Eleven. When I walked out, he said, “Any change?”
I said, “No, you look the same as when I walked in.”
I had nothing to do and I wrote in front of the condo: "I slept with your wife!" Everyone got agitated.
Advice please: is it okay to ask my wife what time tea is ready,
Or should I wait until she's finished cleaning the car ?
If you want to have fun with your kids, tell them the teacher called, then ask if there is something they need to tell you.
My landlord says he needs to come talk to me about how high my A/C bill is.
I told him, “My door is always open”.
I have an inferiority complex about my superiority complex. I know I'm better than you, but I feel really bad about it.
A good way to mess with a jogger is to run up alongside him and say, "It's okay, I think we lost him."
Answering machine message: “I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes.”
I saw an ant in the kitchen so I placed a sugar cube in front of her.
She inspected it and went to tell her friends, then I quickly hid the sugar cube coz I wanted them to think she's a liar.
Saw a van that was covered in dirt at Westlands shopping centre & someone had written
"I wish my wife was as dirty as this van."
So I wrote; "She is...when you are at work!"
To the person who lost their iPhone on the bus this morning...Can you please stop calling my new phone..It's fcuking annoying me.
After hearing about the vegan special, I told our waitress I have a medical condition which prevents me from being a vegan. She asked, Really? I said, it’s a flesh eating disease. She walked away.
If someone tells you ”you look better with a beard” then they are basically saying that you look better the less they can see your face.
My girlfriend just asked me,When we go to Egypt,
Can we go on a camel? I said, No,
It would take ages to get there on a camel.
My Daughter wanted a Cinderella themed birthday party.
So she invited over all her friends and I made them clean the house.