A roundhouse kick to the funny bone, delivering a powerful punchline.
"Chuck Norris doesn't need a stunt double. Stunt doubles need Chuck Norris."
- Tom Cruise
Welcome to the ultimate destination for Chuck Norris jokes! Our collection is packed with the funniest, wittiest, and most hilarious Mr Norris humor that will have you laughing out loud. Whether you're a long-time fan of this incredible man or just looking for a good laugh, our carefully curated selection of jokes is guaranteed to tickle your funny bone. From classic one-liners to clever gags, we've got all the Chuck Norris humor you need to brighten your day.
So, get ready to dive into the world of Chuck Norris jokes and unleash the laughter!
A comedic tribute to the legend himself.
Chuck Norris won the tour de France on a bike with no chain.
John wick killed 3 people in a bar with a pencil that he borrowed from chuck Norris.
Tony Bennet left his heart in San Francisco… yeah… right where Chuck Norris removed it from his chest!
Chuck Norris sleeps with a gun under his pillow. The gun feels much safer now.
When Hunter Biden tried to sell Chuck one of his paintings, Chuck said, “Show me the Monet!”
Chuck Norris can't see himself in a mirror, because there is only one Chuck..
Chuck Norris passed his driving test, from the passenger seat!
Chuck Norris created the World Wide Web using a typewriter.
Coronavirus wears a mask to protect itself from Chuck Norris.
Super Heroes read Chuck Norris comic books.
When it comes to Mr Norris, laughter is the best defense.
Chuck Norris got fact-checked by facebook, he sent facebook to facebook jail.
Chuck Norris can decline the End User License Agreement and still download a program on his computer!
Chuck Norris once looked into Medusa's eyes and Medusa turned to stone!
Chuck Norris doesn't complete online forms because he doesn't submit.
Chuck Norris typically works 40 Hours a day.
Chuck Norris’ rotary phone has WiFi.
Chuck Norris won the spelling bee with one letter.
Chuck once dueled Superman. The loser had to wear his underwear on the outside of his clothes forever!
Chuck Norris once took a chicken egg and hatched an eagle.
Chuck doesn't have to do what Simon says..
And if you ever find yourself in a tough spot, just ask yourself, "What would Mr Norris do?"
Chuck Norris does not need to buy Bitcoin, he already has them all.
Chuck Norris is the reason Bigfoot hides.
Chuck Norris would only have to walk for President.
Chuck Norris can put things back into their original packaging.
When Chuck Norris walks into the ocean he doesn't get wet, the ocean gets Chuck Norris.
There is no theory of evolution...only animals Chuck Norris has allowed to live!
When Eric Bana gets mad he turns into the Hulk, when the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris wears sunglasses, to protect the sun from his eyes…
Chuck Norris once ran a marathon backwards just to see what second place looked like.
Chuck Norris' cowboy boots are made of real cowboys.
He is the embodiment of toughness and badassery.
Chuck Norris doesn't scroll with a mouse, he scrolls with a lion.
Chuck Norris once heard nothing could kill him. So then he tracked down nothing and killed it.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Chuck Norris can speak 25 different languages…at the same time.
Chuck Norris once had a date with destiny. Now destiny won't quit calling him and stalking him on Facebook.
When Chuck Norris visits your house, you become the guest.
Chuck Norris once smoked a cigarette, and gave it cancer.
Spilt milk cries over Chuck Norris.
Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience.
CHUCK NORRIS CAN LEAD A HORSE TO WATER AND MAKE IT DRINK!!!
Enter the realm of Chuck Norris jokes, if you dare!
Chuck Norris walked into a swarm of angry bees and they gave him a free jar of honey.
Chuck Norris was getting into real estate. Evidently he's only selling roundhouses
Facebook crashed because Chuck Norris banned Mark Zuckerberg.
If you can see Chuck Norris he can see you, if you can’t see Chuck Norris be afraid.
Chuck Norris can tell his wife that she was wrong.
Chuck Norris once took a CPR class; he brought the dummy back to life.
Chuck Norris could run for public office as a Republican in Massachusetts and win.
Bad Bad Leroy Brown was the baddest man in the whole dammed town until he bumped into Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris calls customer service a representative answers before the phone rings.
Chuck Norris once prank called 911, 911 called back and apologized...
Chuck Norris jokes: Where humor meets invincibility.
Santa goes to Chuck Norris' house on Christmas eve, to get all the presents he will deliver.
Chuck Norris doesn't abuse Alcohol...He teaches it a FUCKing lesson!!!!
The difference between superman and CHUCK NORRIS?
Superman has a weakness.
Before he starts a new job, CHUCK NORRIS needs to meet with HR to see if they're good enough to keep their jobs,
Chuck Norris can strangle a man with a cordless phone.
If Chuck Norris had been on the Titanic, the iceberg would have sunk.
Chuck Norris can gargle peanut butter.
Chuck Norris' workouts created Global Warming.
When Chuck Norris finishes his meal at a restaurant, the server leaves him a tip.
Chuck Norris once won a downhill go cart race.......going uphill......in a wheelbarrow.......with a flat tire.
Discover the legend behind the laughter: Chuck Norris jokes.
Chuck Norris once taught a German Shepherd to bark in Spanish.
Chuck Norris can speak braille.
Once Chuck Norris was upset with a woman and he showed her his middle finger.
Nine months later, she gave birth to a baby.
When Chuck Norris' phone rings at the cinema,
they put the movie on pause.
Chuck Norris needs a stunt double to do crying scenes.
Chuck Norris likes his meat so rare he only eats unicorns.
Chuck Norris can fold your clothes while you are still wearing them.
Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
Fruit Stripes gum doesn’t lose flavor when Chuck Norris chews it.
M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Chuck Norris can touch this.
Laugh your way through the unstoppable force of Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: “What is courage?” He received an A-plus for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
Chuck Norris went to Spain for the running of the bulls.
The bulls quit.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
Guns wear a Chuck Norris proof vest for protection.
When chuck Norris went to college he told his dad it was time to step up and be man of the house.
Chuck Norris already bought Iphone 14.
Fun fact: When Chuck Norris installed Windows…Microsoft agreed to HIS terms and conditions.
Chuck Norris can titty f@€k his way out of a Booby trap.
Chuck Norris doesnt get calls about his cars extended warranty.
The flu had to have Chuck Norris shots every year.