The pinnacle of cheesy humor.

"I love dad jokes, they're so bad that they're good. It's like a guilty pleasure!"

- Ryan Reynolds

DAD jokes collection.

Dad Jokes: Where puns are the currency and laughter is the reward!

Today my son asked me "can I have a book mark?" I was gutted! 6yrs old and he doesn't know my names Mike. ๐Ÿ˜Ž

Do we require a Current license to drive an Electric car?

What do you name a camel that doesn't have any humps?


I found a snake on my car windscreen once ... i think it was a windscreen viper. ๐Ÿ˜

Whatโ€™s the name of the father of The Children of the Corn?


As a kid I always wanted to be a banker. But now Iโ€™m a Comedian.
I guess I lost interest. ๐Ÿ’ฒ

When itโ€™s raining cats and dogs, make sure not to step in a poodle!! ๐Ÿฉ

Y'all hear the rumor about the butter ?
Dont I ask me, I'm not going to "spread it"

My father has an irrational fear of elevators.
Naturally he is taking some steps to overcome this.

In an attempt to speed up my racing snail, I took the shell off to improve aerodynamics.
Didnโ€™t work. If anything it makes him more sluggish. ๐ŸŒ

Laugh, groan, and eye-roll your way through Dad Jokes: Comedy for the whole family!

I donโ€™t usually tell dad jokes
But when I do he laughs ๐Ÿค—

Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's okay, he woke up.

Kid... dad! Iโ€™m hungry
Dad.... hi hungry.... Iโ€™m dad... nice to meet ya! ๐Ÿ˜Ž

What do sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing, they fast! ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™€๏ธ

I'm currently studying the Ancient Chinese art of bakery.

It's called Kuh ki do ๐Ÿฅ

I got paid for being part of a study at the sleep clinic-

โ€“ It was my dream job! ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

I can't find my "Gone in 60 seconds" DVD.
It was here a minute ago. ๐Ÿ“€

My dogs are called Rolex and Timex......They"re watchdogs

What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between you and me, something smells. ๐Ÿ‘€

What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws?
It was given two consecutive sentences.

Dad Jokes: Making the world a happier place, one corny punchline at a time!

I named my dog "5 miles" so I can tell people I walk 5 miles every day.๐Ÿฉ

Does anyone actually find elevator music uplifting ? ๐ŸŽผ

Everyone who wears glasses ๐Ÿ‘“does so in order to look better.

I'm going fishing today with my two friends Rod and Annette.. ๐ŸŽฃ

I hurt my back in Egypt once .. needed a Cairo-practer. )

You know where I store my dad jokes ?

In a dad-a-base

After picking her son up from school one day, the mother asks him what he did at school. The kid replies, "I had sex with my teacher." She gets so mad that when they get home, she orders him to go straight to his room. When the father returns home that evening, the mother angrily tells him the news of what their son had done. As the father hears the news, a huge grin spreads across his face. He walks to his son's room and asks him what happened at school, the son tells him, "I had sex with my teacher." The father tells the boy that he is so proud of him, and he is going to reward him with the bike he has been asking for. On the way to the store, the dad asks his son if he would like to ride his new bike home. His son responds, "No thanks Dad, my butt still hurts." ๐Ÿ˜Š

Why canโ€™t a personโ€™s nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot! ๐Ÿฆถ

How can you tell if someone is a good farmer?
He is outstanding in his field! ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐ŸŒพ

Whatโ€™s the difference between broccoli and boogers?
Kids donโ€™t eat broccoli! ๐Ÿฅฆ

Discover the art of dad humor on Dad Jokes: Where wit and dad jokes collide!

What do cows order from?
Cattle-logs! ๐Ÿ“–

Why did the teddy bear not want any dessert?
Because she was stuffed! ๐Ÿงธ

What is the witchโ€™s favorite school subject?
Spelling! ๐Ÿ˜Ž

What did the traffic light say to the truck?
Donโ€™t look! Iโ€™m changing! ๐Ÿšฆ

Which hand is better to write with?
Neither. Itโ€™s better to write with a pencil! ๐Ÿ–Š

What kind of room doesnโ€™t have doors?
A mushroom! ๐Ÿ„

What do you call a flower that runs on electricity?
A power plant! ๐ŸŒท

Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs! ๐Ÿ

How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity?
Shocked! ๐Ÿ”Œโšก

Why did the teacher put on sunglasses?
Because her students were so bright! ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐ŸŽ“๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐ŸŽ“

Dad Jokes: The secret weapon for unleashing your inner dad-joke master!

What do you call a dog that can tell time?
A watch dog! ๐Ÿถ

What has hands but canโ€™t clap?
A clock! ๐Ÿ•’

What can you catch but not throw?
A cold! ๐Ÿฅถ

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming?
โ€œHere come the elephants!โ€ ๐Ÿ˜€

Why are elephants so wrinkled?
Because they take too long to iron!

How do you know if thereโ€™s an elephant under your bed?
Your head hits the ceiling! ๐Ÿ˜

Why did the picture go to jail?
It was framed! ๐Ÿ–ผ

Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chickenโ€™s foot! ๐Ÿ”

Where do fish keep their money?
In the river bank! ๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿฆ

Why do sharks swim in saltwater?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze! ๐Ÿคง

Prepare for a giggle-fest on Dad Jokes: Where bad jokes become legendary!

What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!

Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course! The Empire State Building canโ€™t jump!

Why did the man run around his bed?
Because he was trying to catch up on his sleep! ๐Ÿ›Œ

What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck! ๐Ÿšš

Where do cows go for entertainment?
To the moo-vies! ๐Ÿ„

What did one wall say to the other wall?
Iโ€™ll meet you at the corner! ๐Ÿช

How do all the oceans say hello to each other?
They wave! ๐ŸŒŠ

patient: doctor doctor, I dont feel well.
doctor: Hmmm, it looks like you have 5.
patient: 5 what?
doctor: 4,3,2 ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

What do you call a deer with no eyes ?? No idea ๐Ÿ˜‚

What has four letters, never has five letter and sometimes has nine letters ?

Dad Jokes: The Art of Puzzling Wisdom with a Dash of Humor!

I tried to catch fog the other day. Mist.๐Ÿค“

Asking a cab driver the cost from one place to another is a fare question.

โ€œNothing rhymes with orangeโ€

Me: โ€œno it doesnโ€™tโ€ ๐Ÿค—

Don't you hate when people answer their own questions? I do.

Laughter is the best medicine. Except for diarrhoea. ๐Ÿ˜Š

Question: What kind of shorts do clouds wear?


How did the pirate get the flag at such a low price ?

He got it on sail.

Why was the barn so noisy? The cows had horns. ๐Ÿ“ฏ

Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar?
Each one got 6 months. ๐Ÿ—“

Dad Jokes: Bringing the LOLs and cringe-worthy moments to your daily routine!

What animal can jump higher than the Empire State Building??

They all can! Buildings can't jump!! ๐Ÿ˜

When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent.

What is an Eskimos favourite song ?
Whale meat again. ๐Ÿณ

Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work...๐Ÿ“ข

I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger

Then it hit me ๐Ÿ€

What do you say to your sister when sheโ€™s crying?
Are you having a crisis?

Q. How much room should you give fungi to grow?
A. As mushroom as possible.

Why do we get so mad at lazy people... they didnโ€™t do nothing. ๐Ÿ˜Ž

Cereal drowns in milk therefore milk is a cereal killer.

If a lion wants to eat its entire family, It must swallow its pride. ๐Ÿฆ

More dad jokes, puns and wordplays on the following pages...