Stupid Jokes - Unexpectedly Amusing.

Why did the blonde nurse show up to work with a red crayon?
In case she needed to draw blood. 🩸

So this girl blocked me on Facebook because I post too many things about birds. Well, toucan play that game. 😁

Despite the old saying, "Don't take your troubles to bed", many women still sleep with their husbands.

My dad told me to make little things count.

So now I'm teaching math to dwarfs.⛔

I love blueberry pies, apple pies, strawberry pies or any other kind of pies. I am in the Caribbean now. Does anyone know any pie rates of the Caribbean?🦜🏴‍☠️

What's the difference between light and hard?
I can sleep with the light on. 😜

When you speak two languages but start losing vocabulary in both of them... "Byelingual" ✋

Warning to all animal lovers: don't kiss your pet bird--you may catch Chirpees--but don't worry, it's tweetable ...

Someone broke into the local Police Station and stole all their toilet seats.
The police have nothing to go on.

What’s better than roses on your piano?
Tulips on your organ
💋👄

If a brigantine is a 2-masted sailing vessel, what’s a quarantine?

Today I was asked to go out by 20 girls.
Sadly, I was in the women’s bathroom. 🚺

(her during sex): call me names
(me, panicking): you like that, names? 😎

What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A Yamahahaha. 🚲

Bought a chicken to make sandwiches. It doesn't. It shits on the floor. 🚾

Difference between a lentil and a chick pea is.....I've never had a lentil in my face 🤪

I asked 100 people what shampoo they preferred to use whilst taking a shower? They all replied, "How did you get in here?”
🚿

- Is it still India?
- Yes, it's still in, dear! 😎

I liked a Cashier, so I tried to leave a hint, but she didn't respond.

I guess it didn't Register. 🙌

I was kidnapped by mimes....
They did unspeakable acts to me...😱

What did Batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile?
Hey Robin, get in the batmobile. 🚗