Hilarious jokes about ENEMIES that will make your day !

Anxiety is like when video game combat music is playing but you can't find any enemies.

Happy slaves are the biggest enemy of freedom.

A General was visiting the troops at the battlefront.
As he walked along the battle line inspecting the soldiers, a sniper bullet whistled overhead.
"What the devil was that?" he roared.
"It's an enemy sniper, Sir", they answered.
"He's been shooting at us for about two weeks.We know exactly where he is."
"Well, why the hell don't you send someone out to kill him?"
"Sir, if we did that, they might replace him with someone who could shoot straight."

Can anyone tell me if the skulls of your enemies are dishwasher safe?

War is when your government tells you who the enemy is. Revolution is when you figure it out for yourself.

Happy slaves are the biggest enemy of freedom.

"The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge."
- Stephen Hawking

Can anybody tell me if
"The skulls of your enemies" are dishwasher safe?

Never tell somebody everything. You might be educating an enemy.

“Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.”
— Napoleon Bonaparte

“It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.”
— William Blake

“No enemy is worse than bad advice.”
— Sophocles

Sinner's Law of Retaliation: Do whatever your enemies don't want you to do.

Pastore's Truths:
Even paranoids have enemies.
This job is marginally better than daytime TV.
On alcohol: four is one more than more than enough.

Jones's Motto: Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
McClaughry's Codicil on Jones's Motto: To make an enemy, do someone a favor.

I stuck pins in a voodoo doll of my arch enemy.
I managed to cure his backache and help him quit smoking.

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
— Napoleon Bonaparte

A liars worst enemy is someone with a good memory.

Maturing is realizing her vibrator is your team mate, not your enemy.

Sometimes Get Suitcase,Go To The Airport,Get Pictures And Go Back Home 🙄 Just To Confuse Your Enemies.🙆‍♂️

“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”

- Oscar Wilde

No enemy is worse than bad advice.
•Sophocles

Can anyone tell me if the skulls of your enemies are dishwasher safe?

ALWAYS FORGIVE YOUR ENEMIES; NOTHING ANNOYS THEM SO MUCH.

"Larga vida a mis enemigos, para que puedan ver mi gloria."
Bob Marley

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

"Is it a crime to throw sodium chloride into enemy's eyes?"
"Yes, that's assault."

"I know its a salt but, is it a crime?

They say that eating palm leaves can cure constipation.
With fronds like that, who needs enemas?

My friends love scaring the crap out of me.

With friends like that who needs enemas?

"Larga vida a mis enemigos, para que puedan ver mi gloria." Bob Marley

A General was visiting the troops at the battlefront.
As he walked along the battle line inspecting the soldiers, a sniper bullet whistled overhead.
"What the devil was that?" he roared.
"It's an enemy sniper, Sir", they answered.
"He's been shooting at us for about two weeks.We know exactly where he is."
"Well, why the hell don't you send someone out to kill him?"
"Sir, if we did that, they might replace him with someone who could shoot straight."

Anxiety is like when video game combat music is playing but you can't find any enemies.