Random astronaut joke:
Do you know what you call a black man on the moon?
An astronaut, you fucking racist.
Selected astronaut jokes:
Q: Why did an introvert become an astronaut?
A: He needed his space.
How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep? You rocket!
What kind of tea do astronauts not drink in space? Gravi-Tea!
When we first landed on the moon, the astronauts noted there was print on the moon that said “Chuck Norris was here.”
More astronaut jokes...
Where do astronauts poop?
The #2 airlock!
Do you know what you call a black man on the moon?
An astronaut, you fucking racist.
—¿Cuánto hace que no sales por ahí?
—Eres el astronauta más tonto que conozco.
What did one Astronaut say to other Astronaut -
Let's have Launch.
Q: Why did an introvert become an astronaut?
A: He needed his space.
I asked an astronaut how he blew his nose in space and he told me "snot rocket science, kid."
NASA hired a claustrophobic astronaut.
.
He just needed a little space.
'm just pondering: Does NASA teach all the astronauts the moon walk dance?
A snail that meows, a squirrel in an astronaut suit,and a crab with a whale for a daughter:The Directors of Spongebob were obviously high.
When astronauts die they run an orbituary.
The astronaut drives a Saturn, the pimp drives a cheap Escort, and the proctologist drives a brown Probe.
How do you stop an astronaut's baby from crying?
You Rocket!
The astronaut is getting married and he is over the moon through out the process.
One of astronauts first missions was to watch the Earth rotate from space. After 24 hours they got bored & called it a day.
I wanted to be an astronaut and herbalist.
My girlfriend wouldn't give me the thyme and space.
What do astronauts eat for dinner? Launch meat.
What's a specimen?
An Italian astronaut.
Why do astronauts use linux?
because you can't open windows in space.
What kind of tea do astronauts not drink in space? Gravi-Tea!
How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep? You rocket!
When we first landed on the moon, the astronauts noted there was print on the moon that said “Chuck Norris was here.”
Why are astronauts always so calm and efficient? Zero pressure in vacuum.
Q. What's an astronaut's favorite social media website?
A. MySpace.
The astronaut was fooling around in space and failed to understand the gravity of the situation!
What's an astronaut's favorite part of a computer?
The space bar.
I always wanted to be an astronaut like my Dad.
He always wanted to be an astronaut as well.
How do you get a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket...