Circumcision Jokes: Bringing humor to the tip.

I'm so torn on circumcision.

I mean, you're either foreskin or against it.

The cross-eyed circumciser was so bad, he got the sack.

Went to a russian doctor to be circumcised.
His name was Dr Kutchakokov.

Is there an age limit for circumcision? I'd like to know the cut off date.

How much does a circumcisionist make?
$25.00 an hour plus tips.

How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.

Did you hear about the blind circumciser? He got the sack.

My son asked me why I had him CIRCUMCISED, I SAID because every woman will GRAB AT ANYTHING that has 20 percent off.

Your small dick only proves one thing; your circumcision took more than one try.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q. What's the difference between getting a divorce and getting circumcised?
A. When you get a divorce, you get rid of the whole prick.

"I had a circumcision at one day old. One day old! Can you believe it? I couldn't walk for a year!!"

Young boy sat in class scratchin his crotch.
Teacher asked him what's wrong.
Embarrased, he said he'd just been circumcised & was really itchy. !
Teacher told him to go and phone his mum for advice.
He comes back with his cock hangin out!
Teacher asks "what on earth are you doing"?
"Well miss, mum said if I could stick it out til lunchtime she'd come & get me.

What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip-off!

When I was in college, I was rejected from every fraternity because I was circumcised.

Apparently, you need to be a complete dick.

Didn't realise 35 is the max age someone can be circumcised. Apparently that's the cut off age!

When I was in college, all the fraternities rejected me because I was circumcised.
You had to be a complete dick.

My friend worked at the zoo to circumcise elephants, the pay was bad but...
The tips were huge.

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see who’s best at his job. So they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. Later they get together. The priest begins: “When I found the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his first communion.” “I found a bear by the stream,” says the minister, “and preached God’s holy word. The bear was so mesmerized that he let me baptize him.” They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a gurney in a body cast. “Looking back,” he says, “maybe I shouldn't have started with the circumcision.”

I was a surgeon. I was doing a circumcision but slipped with the scalpel and got the sack.

How do you compliment someone on performing a circumcision?
Tell ’em to keep the tip.

A Geordie is drinking in a London bar when he gets a call on his mobile phone:
He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, he orders a round of drinks for everyone in the bar, because, he announces his wife has just produced a typical Geordie baby boy weighing 25 pounds.
Nobody can believe that any baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the Geordie shrugs. "That's about average in the Northeast. Like I said, my boy is a typical Geordie baby boy."
Congratulations showered him from all around and many exclamations of "Jeezaz" were heard.
One woman even fainted due to sympathy pains.
Two weeks later the Geordie returns to the bar.
The bartender says. "You're the father of that typical Geordie baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth. Everybody's been having bets about how big he'd be in 2 weeks. We were going to call you. So, how much does he weigh?"
The proud father answers. "17 pounds"
The bartender is puzzled and concerned. "What happened? He weighed 25 pounds the day he was born."
The Geordie father takes a long slow swig from his beer, wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans onto the bar and proudly says..............
"Had him circumcised" 🤣

How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
Kick his sister in the jaw.