Adult Jokes Galore: Laugh Away with Our Premium Collection.

Glory hole : The ultimate game of 'guess who?

People who buy sex dolls...

are just fucking dummies...,

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SEX YOU PAY FOR AND SEX FOR FREE IS SEX YOU PAY FOR IS CHEAPER.

What do you call a sex toy that isn't used for penetration?

A dildon't

Office romance is not ideal

But I like the woman in the office. They compliment me when I come early.

Anal sex keeps my gf in shape. Every time I just mention it and she runs a mile from me.

Today, me and my wife had a .69
It would have been a hundred times better without the period.

Approximately 70 percent of the earth is covered by water. Only 1 percent of this water is drinkable.
Therefore 69 is dirty.

When a man and a woman have simultaneous oral sex, we call it 69. What do we call it if it is two men in a similar position?
Eleven.

What does 69 plus 69 equal ?
Dinner for 4.

Incest. When “slow down and apply more lube bro” REALLY means slow down and apply more lube bro.

*Sexting over walkie talkies*

“Hell yeah baby bend over.”

“Bend what? Over.”

Why do women prefer older Gynecologists?
Their hands shake.

What is it called when a man feels bad for squirting on a woman?
Cumpassion.

If you think female squirt isn't piss.
Then Urine for a big surprise.

How do you know if you have a high sperm count?
She has to chew before she swallows!

Yeah, it’s an orgy but we still have rules!
Come on people!

Have you heard about the orgy at the campground?
It’s fucking in tents.

What is Princess Leia's favorite sex act fetish ?
Giving Han Jobs.

I've developed some really weird fetishes lately.
What have I come to?

Origami porn is in creasing on paper view.

Good- I've just had a threesome.

Bad-It was two guys and a girl.

Ugly-The girl was a blow-up doll.

I never want to have a threesome,
If I wanted to dissappoint two people at once I'd have dinner with my parents.

My girlfriend asked me if I could have a threesome, which of her friends I would choose.
Apparently, I was only supposed to name one, not two.

Remember: Having sex on regular basis helps keep your memory alive.
Remember: Having sex on regular basis helps keep your memory alive.

I wish you all a great 2017.

I've been having treatment for premature ejaculation.
I'm getting better now, but it was touch and go for a while.

I just had sex with a girl who's celebrating her fifth birthday.
She said being born on Leap Day really sucks.

15% of women admit to having used vibrators.
The other 85% said they bought them new.

My wife said if I don’t do page 7 of the Kama sutra she will leave me.
It put me in a very difficult position.

People needed to learn loyalty from dogs, we learned positions.

Not to brag, but I’ve satisfied every waitress that has ever served me.
With just the tip.

There's something mysterious about the G-spot.
I just can't put my finger on it.

What's the difference between the moon and the female g-spot.
We have videos to prove that men have been to the moon.

A friend of mine opened up a new strip club called the G-Spot. He had to close a week later because most men couldn't find it.

I was a bit upset when I overheard our lass telling her friend I'm useless in the bedroom department.
The wallpapering isn't that bad.

GIRL: why didn’t you tell me you had a small guitar?

BOY: you didn’t inform me I was going to perform in a community hall.

Two elderly ladies were out jogging in the park, a flasher jumped out on them...one lady had a stroke, the other couldn't reach.

She said if I turned off the light, I could stick it in her bum.
I guess I should have let the bulb cool first.

I snatch kisses and....
Vice versa

Is the female version of tea bagging called flappuccino???